What’s the Best Owl Hooter?

Long time ago, I was futzing with my latest owl hooter, trying to get it to work. I was down hunting with some serious turkey hunters in Mississippi and they were laughing at the Yankee and his pathetic owl hooter.

“No turkey is gonna hear that.” said my buddy. “It’s too soft.”

“So what do you do?”

“We just call using our own voices.”

He showed me. It didn’t sound much like a barred owl, but the cadence was dead on. The next morning he was doing it. A couple of the other guys were doing it. I did it. It worked.

To this day, I can owl loud enough to probably cover my entire 200 acres. I just lay my head back and go “Who-cooks-for-you-(pause)-Who-cooks-for-You-all” (actually more like “Hoo-Hoo- HooHoo! Hoo-Hoo-HaHooRrrraw!”) and I roll the last part. Not only does it set off gobblers, but it sets off the barred owls, and once they’re going, they really do all the work for me anyway. The only trick to it is having the cadence down. Neither the turkeys or the owl particularly care about the tone.

What’s more, I can honk off barred owls just about any time of year with my call, and it’s got to be an entertainment for us. We’ll be sitting out back after dark, and I’ll sound off. The closest owls will sound off in response and this will set off a set territorial hootings that go all over the neighborhood.

One other thing: Owl hooting is gets to be kind of like yodeling in the turkey woods. If you hear a loud obnoxious obviously fake owl hoot, you know it’s another turkey hunter. I’ve traded owl hoots with other hunting parties that were a quarter mile away. It’s a call that does not seem to spook anything. The same thing can be said of a good loud crow call, if you throw in at least one totally fake sound in the middle. Before walkie-talkies and cell phones, these were good tricks to share with your buddies so you didn’t shoot each other.

So about twelve years ago, I was working at the frozen cheeseburger factory and a new president for our division was sent in from the home office. Right away I get a call. The new president wants to see me. He’s a hunter from Michigan and he’s never hunted turkeys and wants to learn. I had several meetings with him, and helped him get set up.

One day he runs into me up in Sales and Marketing– a big bay of cubicles taking up half the building on the second floor.

“So tell me about owling again.” he says

“Well, Norb,” I replied “It’s like this. . . ” I tell him basically what I’ve told you just now.

“So how does it sound?” he asks. I tried to give him a low-volume demonstration. At a whisper it didn’t sound good. I apologized.

“Do it again.” said Norb “Do it at full volume.”

“Okay,” I said. “But you remember that you asked for it.” I laid my head back and gave it a good one. Every head in every cubicle suddenly popped up and swiveled over to me and Norb.

“Yep,” said Norb, looking out over the startled mass, “You’re right, it really does work, doesn’t it?”

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